They say you get wiser as you get older. It hasn’t worked for me. There are still some things that I just don’t understand. Maybe you can help me.
- When I do my laundry there is that sign on the washer that says I have to take everything out of my pockets. So as soon as I get the thing running I quickly put my wallet, keys, change, cigarettes, and lighter on top of the machine. What would happen if I didn’t do that? How would the washer know?
- I bought one of those baking potatoes with the plastic stuff wrapped around it. The directions say to leave the plastic on the potato and microwave it for 7-8 minutes. The potato came out pretty good, but the plastic was still kinda chewy. Should I have cooked in longer?
- How come when I go to a hair cutting salon I can’t get a beer?
- Why is the last book of the Bible called Revolutions? There is no war.
- Why did they build a large hardon collider over in Europe? Who would want to do that?
- I stopped at a traffic light behind a truck that had a sign on the back telling me to stay back 50 feet. So I backed up. I was just following directions, but they said the accident was my fault!
- My kerosene heater says “Do Not Tip Over!”. So I make sure not to drink before using it. What difference would it make if I tipped over?
- My dad used to buy Ethyl at the gas station every week. Who is she?
- The directions on my shampoo bottle say to wash hair, rinse, and repeat. So I washed my hair, rinsed, and repeated. Washed my hair, rinsed, and repeated. Washed my hair, rinsed, and repeated. Washed my hair, rinsed, and repeated. Thankfully I ran out of shampoo before the water got cold.
- Where can I visit a farm that raises boneless chickens?